Tomorrow is Lily's Due Date

Since I will be gone all day tomorrow, I wanted to mention that Nov. 15 is Lily's due date. As I look at the ticker on the top of my blog, I can't believe that so many things happened in just those short 9 months since finding out I was pregnant to learning about Lily's problems to her going to heaven and then getting pregnant again on the first try and now I'm over 9 weeks along with Baby2 on Lily's due date. EEK that is a lot to happen in a very small time. Normally I just go to horse shows all spring/summer/fall...which takes a lot less emotion than what happened this year. I guess the reward isn't a baby either:/

As I watch many friends struggling to get pregnant with their 1st babies, it brings to mind the saying "it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved before". Which I feel is very true in my situation. We are so grateful to have had Lily for those 5.5 months but still feel pain, especially tomorrow, as we're not bringing her home from the hospital but starting over with Baby2. The pain is not the heartbreaking ache that we felt after we lost her in July but more of a sense of loss for what could have been.
I also remember one of my friends (who also lost their 1st) saying that they would never have had their Miss Q (as they were only planning on having one baby) if they wouldn't have lost their 1st one. Not that she wanted to lose the 1st baby but she can't imagine life without Miss Q. So I too think of that...we would never have THIS Baby2 if we didn't lose Lily. We would have A Baby2 but not this one as that would be impossible. Of course we never wanted to lose Lily but that was never our choice either. As a Type A/control freak, the fact that I have almost no control over the whole baby thing freaks me out. I really have a problem with that...but again I have no control over that either:/

So I just wanted to take a minute and thank God for the blessing that is Lily and thank God again for Baby2 as only he knows what is in store for Lance and I and our parenting expedition.

On a different note, I think we have a sick cat. Poor Uggs was been limping on his right hind leg for the last 2 days. He's also sleeping a lot. He seems to have more life in him today but when he sleeps his breathing is weird and I just don't like the way he looks. I'm going to call the vet to see what they say and probably bring him in today or Monday. Of course this always happens to us on Friday! At least we do have an emergency pet hospital for nites and weekends and Casse.lton Vet Clinic can usually slide us in on Saturday morning as they have before with Teddy. I'll let you know how things go.

Have a great weekend! It's snowing lightly here and sounds like it will for most of the day but nothing is staying on the ground. Tis the season!

1st dr. appt a success!

We had our 1st official doctor appt this morning and everything looked great! This is a huge relief to Lance and I as this was the appt that Dr. R thought something looked wrong/weird with Lily. He said Baby2 looks perfect and sees nothing to be concerned with!! YAY!!! We have a picture but I need to scan it so I will do that tomorrow. I can't really tell what is what but I think I see a leg:)
I've gained 2 lbs also:/ I was hoping that I would stay the same weight as I did with Lily (never went up a single lb all 21 weeks but I had a lot more sickness with Lily too) but alas that is not going to be the case! My jeans feel looser in the butt and thighs but the tummy is barely fitting. I guess it's going to be stretchy pants sooner than later. I just hope I can wedge myself into my bridesmaid dress in 3 weeks. God willing and grease helping -I will;)

No snow yet!

Just rain. Most of ND, SD and some of MN have snow but not us! I'm a little disappointed that there isn't a flurry of white stuff out my window but then I think "it's only November". There is plenty of time for snow! Still there is something nice about being snowed in.

Because it has been constant rain, Teddy has been inside for the majority of the time...only going out when necessary. It's amazing how little rain it takes to make a dog stink! We have this puppy cologne that smells like powder that we spray on him in between groomings. He absolutely HATES it! As soon as you go to the door that contains the spray, he takes off. He shows his teeth, sneezes and ruts like a bull. It is by far the funniest thing I've ever seen him do! We don't use the spray very often in the spring, summer or fall but definitely the winter! Once sprayed, he desperately wants to go outside to rub it off. He rolls around in the grass or snow trying to rub it off. Again, very funny! Due to my very sensitive pregnant nose, I can detect stinky dog from a mile away. I pulled out the spray this morning and had to bribe him with a treat and still chase him down. Right now he's running around the house trying to rub it off on anything he can. Do dogs not like to smell powder fresh?

I feel like I'm in a holding pattern.

I'm pregnant again (as I have been for most of 2008) with hopefully a MUCH BETTER turn out than the first time. I love the fact that it took us no time at all to get pregnant with Baby2 but I miss feeling like my normal self. I am ~not~ complaining about being pregnant because it is such a blessing and we are very lucky to be blessed again BUT there are things that I do miss from my ~normal~ life. I've been in the 1 trimester for 5 months in 2008 and it's getting a little old! Bear with me now as I list my "can't wait to do again"!! Again I'm not trying to take anything away from the blessing that is Miss Lily and Baby2 but if you've been pregnant, you know how the 1st tri can be ICK!

1. RIDE.MY.HORSE!!!
this is SO #1 on my list!! I can't wait to start showing again too. It's painful to have such an awesome horse just sitting in the pen waiting for me to get my crap together! To remedy this, Faith is going to the trainers in Feb for some finishing and hopefully I'm not too ginormous so I can show her in halter and showmanship while the trainer shows her in the riding classes. That should help fill my horse need:)

2. Be able to eat and smell anything and not gag.

3. Multitask
- I am the QUEEN of multitasking and I cannot do it while pregnant. I don't have the memory or the energy for it. I have SO many projects I'd like to get done but mostly I wind up on the couch taking a nap. Thank God I have an amazing and understandable husband.

4. Go from sun up to sun down (like I use to) and not need to sit and rest.

5. Lift my saddle out of the trailer by myself without my husband yelling at me.

6. Be able to get my butt into the bed in the gooseneck of our horse trailer without the help of a crane, fork lift or Lance pushing my butt all while I'm giggling so much that I can't pull myself up. It's quite the process to get up there while pregnant. Hence the need for a RV instead of the horsetrailer.

7. Drinking!
-whether it's Diet Dew or an ice cold beer, I would LOVE to have some! Now I ~know~ several people that don't give up caffeine while pregnant and do have an occasional alcoholic sip or two but I don't. For 2 reasons.....#1 is that Diet Dew tastes weird while I'm pregnant. It has a metallic taste...ick. #2 is because I'm basically a goody-two-shoes and while I ~might~ have a sip or 2 of wine around Christmas or Thanksgiving I couldn't in good conscience drink while being pregnant. My perinatologist (w/ Lily) said having a glass of wine early in the pregnancy was not a problem and that Lily wouldn't be getting any of it anyways. I still didn't have any but she's the expert so a little sip here or there might happen as long as it doesn't ~smell~ funny.

8. Plan where to eat a week or 2 ahead of time without worrying about whether it will agree with me or not. (this is such a pain!)

9. Button my pants!!

10. Snuggle with my hubby at night.
- I'm so warm all the time (more so than usual) and Lance is a furnace so it's more like a firm handshake or a pat on the shoulder than nice snuggling in bed. Although that's how we got into this ~situation~ so maybe I'll have to rethink that;-)

Go Vote!

Lance and I scheduled this week's work trip around being home tonight in time to vote. That and taking Faith to get new shoes tomorrow! It's so important to have your voice heard.

GO VOTE!

Other things on the agenda today include getting the black dye from the leather accents off of my red showmanship outfit. It cleaned up beautifully yesterday or so I thought. This morning there's black streaks all over! EEK! It better come off! I need to run to the post office and clean the house. Tomorrow is suppose to bring rain and then snow so I'm getting as many outside things done today as possible. Then I'm going to plop myself in front of the tv to see how the presidential outcome ends up.

Have a great voting day!

My first publication...

is finally here! I have 2 layouts in the November issue of Scrapbooking.com . These were picked up a few months ago but you have to keep it quiet until the issue is published. That was so hard for me to keep my mouth shut!!

Take a look:
http://scrapbooking.com/article/72520

What a Halloween it was!!!!

Here is Teddy in his dragon costume! He always wears a costume when he ~helps~ hand out candy to all the trick or treaters. It's a little small for him but he was a great sport with the whole costume thing:)

Next is Lance and I and Missy and Clay (my bff and her hubby) at our Halloween party. It was SO much fun!! Although this pregnant lady wasn't the life of the party as I was so tired but at least I made it longer than the other 2 preggos!
Lance and I are Cliff and Claire Huxtable from the Cosby Show!!






It was such a blast! I will post more pics of all the great costumes!!

Hope everyone had a great and safe Halloween!!