Saturday, July 26, 2008

A lazy Saturday.... for some....


This is how the Haugen household looked for most of the morning. What a rough life they lead!

This is what I've been doing. I've always wanted to learn how to knit and Lily finally inspired me enough to try. I mean, what was I waiting for? Plus we received some amazing things from the hospital that were donated from people who had been in our same situation. I want to be able to recipricate the gifts to others that follow in our painful footsteps, in Lily's honor. Of course I wish for no one to ever have to go through that but that's like wishing for world peace...it's just not going to happen. So I've decided to teach myself how to knit. I can kind of crochet but I seem to get bored with that. It seems like you can do so many more things with knitting. I'm starting out with a scarf. I've also signed up for a beginner's class to get some professional instruction as I'm probably not doing it entirely correct.

I also got a new phone as my mot.orola Q sucks! Lovin' the green color, although it'd be better if it was purple!! How cute is it??


And one last pic as these are my favorite of all the flowers we received in Lily's honor. Aren't they precious? I love all the color and absolutely everything about them. The pot/vase is going to go in my scrapbook room when the flowers have died. I think I might actually try to recreate the whole arrangement in silk. We'll see:)

Have a great weekend!

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

What happens...

when you mix this furry puppy (Teddy)

(don't you love his booties!!)

with a lake?




Tadaaa...




He's naked! Poor Teddy! I think he actually likes his new "do". The cats aren't real sure what to think of him as Maui hissed at him immediately as Teddy walked into the house. Eventually he did warm up to him. Uggs just wants to sniff him and try to figure out who or what he is!!

In other news, things are going pretty well considering it's been the month from hell. The days are starting to get easier even though I do have my occasional flare up of emotion. I think it's to be expected and completely reasonable. I can't believe all the pregnant women I see lately....~sigh~ I am jealous of them as I really enjoyed being pregnant and hope to find myself in that same situation by the end of the year.
We started on Lily's garden last nite. The lilies that we received from friends were starting to look a little sad so we wanted to get them in the ground asap. They are looking better this morning already. I have a lot more rock to move and bushes and flowers to plant but a little at a time. I'm having a heck of a time with being dizzy. My mom said it's because of not being pregnant anymore and my bodies balance and inner ear is off. Is that right? Anyone heard of that? I'll have to look it up.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

Much needed vacation.

First of all, thanks again for all the support as we go through this horrible time. I really hope that no one ever has to feel the pain of losing your baby as it is by far the worst thing I have EVER had to go through. With that said, I am so grateful for many things during this difficult time:
  1. our time with Lily...they were 21 glorious weeks
  2. feeling Lily move inside of me
  3. Lance getting to feel Lily one time before she became an angel
  4. being able to give birth to Lily which was by far the most amazing experience of my entire life
  5. spending several precious hours holding her and watching Lance rock her as he lovingly gazed at her
  6. realizing that Lily has my eyes, nose & long fingers and her daddy's chin & toes
  7. having Lily at home before her cremation
  8. all the family and friends that have helped us and supported us
  9. the idea and design for Lily's garden -which will be built in the next month in our backyard in honor of our 1st child. We have received so many lilies which will be the foundation for Lily's garden along with a memorial bench in the center. It's going to be beautiful.

Now that most of the major things are done with, Lance and I are heading out for some much needed R & R. Lance has some work to do north of us and I'm going to go with him. We're going to take the truck and trailer and camp along the way. I've never been to the places he has to work so we're going to do some work and some tourist things. We're both really looking forward to getting away.

I also wanted to let my pregnant friends know that I am going to try to stay up-to-date with your pregnancies and happenings eventhough I haven't for the last few weeks. As you can imagine, I haven't been on any pregnancy blogs recently as it's so difficult. I pray that all of you have healthy babies and uneventful pregnancies. Once I get back from the R&R, I will get caught up with all of you and hopefully be more able to post comments as I love hearing that everything is going well for all of you.

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Thank you so much...

Your outpouring of love and support has been absolutely amazing and so very helpful in this difficult time. Thank you to everyone from Lost and Found and to whom ever added my name/blog to that list. I looked at the Lost and Found site yesterday and am looking forward to really digging into it. I think that will really help with the healing.

Today is a much better day already. I don't have the overwhelming, all consuming feeling of pain and sadness. I woke up thinking happy thoughts of Lily and our journey together. I still feel a great loss but I'm trying to focus on the positive side of this experience and just be thankful that we had Lily for 21 glorious weeks. That's definitely better than nothing. Besides, Lily wouldn't want her mommy to be sad and miserable...so for Lily (and myself & my wonderful DH), I will smile and enjoy the beautiful day outside because I know Lily is in heaven enjoying it herself so we can share in that. That warms my heart.

Yesterday we were able to get many of the painful items taken care of and I feel much more at ease with everything. I wrote the obit for the newspapers and we met with the funeral home to arrange Lily's cremation. They were kind enough to come to our home and bring Lily with them so we were able to say goodbye to our sweet baby girl one more time while she was at home...her home...for the very first time. That was extremely helpful for us. Lily will join us again at home in a couple of days. That's when we will have our memorial service. We just want something simple at our home.

Again thank you to everyone for your support. It is so very appreciated!!

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Very sad news....triggs....

The exciting moments of pregnancy have turned
to sorrow and heartfelt loss with the death of
our baby, Lily Ann Hope Haugen, on July 6, 2008.
Although she wasn't born yet, Lily was a beloved
member of our family and a joy to her parents,
grandparents, uncles and other relatives. We cherish
the few hours we had to hold her and cuddle her after
her birth and could not have loved her more. Now she
is in heaven where she can be held and cuddle and loved
by God, but Lily will live on in our hearts and memories forever.

Lily is survived and cherished by her parents, Lance & Kelly Haugen,
her grandparents, Becky Fahy, Dave Fahy and Curt & LaDon Haugen,
her uncles, Lee Fahy and Curtis (Alyssa) Haugen, her great-grandparents,
Linda Paavola, Margaret Fahy and Paul & Lyla Olson, along with many

additional relatives that love her dearly. She was proceeded in death by her great-grandparents,Edwin Paavola, Vern Fahy and Severt & Doris Haugen.

There will be private funeral services held later in the week.